Ten Hours and Counting...

I've been waiting all summer for this... in fact, it's the only day all year that I asked the geek to take off work and watch the kids!
It's the Iowa Highway 141 Garage Sale! Over 10 towns along highway 141... with garage sales all along the way!
I can't wait!

http://www.141sale.com/index.html

At Last!

The geek and I finally brought our vintage lawn chairs somewhere to get sandblasted and powder-coated. We're excited- we've had them over a year and they've just been sitting in our garage. I'll post pics when we get them back!

Done!

The living room chair is done. I stayed up late last night to finish it... except the stapling which I did this morning once the kiddos were awake. It's cute... but not especially comfy. I reused the old buttons, but for some reason they feel more lumpy than before. It's probably the fabric. Maybe I should try a different fabric for the other one?



The kids are destroyers of furniture- seriously. This is the third "thrifted" chair I've done for the living room. None of them have lasted too long with the kids. I don't think any of them have cost more than $20 (besides my time updating them). However, none of them have been especially comfy for the geek or I to sit in, so they basically sit unused except for the kids jumping and rocking on them. My plan (or dream actually) is to buy a new armchair at Ikea the next time we're visiting my folks in Minneapolis. Our couch is super comfy but the geek has claimed that. I would love a chair of my own to read in!



I'm sure this one won't last long either... as you can see, DS is already using it!

Living Room Chairs...

Before:

In Process:


This has been my project the past few days. I bought these two chairs for $3.99 each at Goodwill. I thought they had a "french-look" about them... so I took a chance that I could make them more attractive. I stripped all the fabric and batting off (scary), painted the frame black, and now I'm working on putting the new fabric on. It has been fun... I'll show the finished product in a day or two!

Scary...

Sometimes when I look at DS it is like I'm looking right at the geek. The resemblance is uncanny...

Fun with Photos!

I came across this website today and have been having fun with some of our pics! Check it out yourself!

www.photofunia.com

More Autism In the News...

I couldn't sleep last night after hearing about this radio host's comments regarding children with autism. It has gotten me so angry, and I don't even know him nor do I listen to his radio show. I'm all for freedom of speech, but his comments just seemed entirely uncalled for.

http://www.bostonherald.com/news/regional/general/view.bg?articleid=1108343&srvc=home&position=active

I do understand the debate... yes, more children are being diagnosed and no one can explain why. That's why we need more money for research and education. Obviously he has never spent a day with a child with autism... at least not my child(ren). What I wouldn't give for him to be able to walk a day in our shoes.

He's an idiot...

"...I've Got a Feeling We're Not In Kansas Anymore..."

Last night we had a crazy storm here... you can see some of the aftermath in the above picture (pic courtesy of the Des Moines Register).
I'm a nervous sleeper and can't sleep during heavy rains and wind, so I stayed up until almost 2:30am watching the weather go from bad to worse. Around 2:30am it seemed calmer, so I went to sleep, but an hour later the house was literally shaking from the wind and the tornado sirens were going off. The geek looked out the window, told me to grab the kids and get into the basement. One of the trees in our backyard was literally bending in half from the wind. We grabbed the kids and hid downstairs in the bathroom. Not long after that the power went off... and stayed off until almost noon today.
DS didn't go back to sleep until almost 11am, so it has been a long night/morning for us. We don't have any damage, but our neighborhood does. Thank goodness we finally got our electricity back... the kids without TV are not fun! 100MPH winds were recorded- crazy!

We Got the Pox...

Took DD to the doctor this morning, and she has chicken pox. I was hoping it was just a rash... but they're fairly certain it's not. We had to cancel therapy for today and probably much of the rest of the week, since the therapists can't be exposed and work with other kids. Luckily, she had the chicken pox vaccine, so it's a mild case. It doesn't seem to be bothering her at all. Now, DS hasn't had the vaccine yet... so we're anticipating a full blown outbreak with him. Keep your fingers crossed it misses him.
Actually I'm happy they're getting it while they're young. I was in my teens when I got it and it was BAD!

Weekly Weigh-In

Yes, I am still going to my WW meetings... but after taking about a month off, I was up a few pounds. So, I'm back at it again. That's life!

Autism Walk 2008

Here are a couple pics from the autism walk this year! We had a great turnout- our team raised over $2,000 for autism research. It was a hot, hot, hot day... but I think everyone had fun!


Gibson with Grandma Joanne

"The Guilt Factor"

Lately the geek and I have been trying to have better communication and an open dialogue about some of the feelings we've been having regarding the kid's autism. This is no easy task... I tend to get overly emotional about everything (surprise, surprise) and the geek has his own problems talking about the diagnosis'.
And it seems, at least to me, that we both have a lot of unresolved feelings of guilt. We both blame ourselves (maybe not directly, but we still do)... and deep down I'm sure each of us blames the other one too.
I found this article called "The Guilt Factor" when I was searching some of my autism boards. I found it very helpful for me.

When a child is diagnosed with autism, parents develop a new vocabulary. Conversations contain words like ABA, receptive and expressive language, discrete trial training, eye contact, floor time and biomedical approaches. Parents share their joys, their fears, their strategies and their dreams. In fact, almost everything is easily discussed except one thing – THE GUILT FACTOR.

While it’s proven time and again that parents are NOT responsible for their child’s autism, many parents have this nagging little feeling somewhere deep inside that they are to blame. If they don’t feel they caused the autism, they typically feel that their child would be doing better and progressing faster if they just put more effort into it.

One can only equate it to preparing for the Bar exam. No matter how much you study, you could always do a little more. Simple every day activities result in great emotional stress for an autism spectrum parent. It’s not long before the “guilt factor” spills over into every area of life.

HOW THE GUILT FACTOR IMPEDES YOUR LIFE

Your autism spectrum child is interested in animals. In a completely “non-typical” method of conversation, your child names all the farm animals and wants you to repeat it back to him. Again and again and again! You do so and the guilt factor sets in. “This is so inappropriate” you think to yourself. “I should take this opportunity to teach my child how to converse appropriately.” But you know that if you don’t comply to your child’s wishes he’ll have a meltdown, and you’re busying making dinner, your two year old is crying because she’s hungry and your eldest needs help with her homework questions. Disheartened, you continue the banter with your child, blaming yourself for not doing a better job.

The telephone rings and it’s your friend. You’re thoroughly enjoying the conversation but just then you notice your child repeatedly spinning the wheels on a toy truck while making a strange noise. “I shouldn’t be talking to my friend. I should be teaching my child how to play with that toy” you silently berate yourself. Then your child begins to run up and down the hall and you silently reprimand yourself. “I must get off this phone. Time is precious and I should be engaging my child”. Feeling discouraged, you’re torn between hanging up on your friend and redirecting your child.

When picking up your child from OT, you chat politely to the other parents. One mother mentions that her daughter has extra speech therapy. Another one talks about the social skills group she enrolled her son in. Another one declares that she just signed her child up for Karate with an aide to help him. Despair and guilt wash over you. “These parents do so much” you think to yourself. “How do they do it? Where do they find the time? I should do more. Perhaps I should have signed my child up for Karate instead of swimming.” As the guilt factor sets in, you shamefully accuse yourself of being a bad parent.

It’s been a long day and you’re exhausted. You’ve been to work, dealt with tantrums, spoken to three teachers, rearranged your child’s therapy schedule, cooked dinner, bathed your children, cleaned up and prompted your child through simple activities. As you plop on the couch to watch some TV, that feeling of guilt washes over you. “I shouldn’t be relaxing.” You say to yourself. “I should be re-writing my child’s program. I should be researching new methods of treatment. I should be going over my child’s IEP.” But your brain can’t take one more thought about autism and you guiltily sink into the couch and think “Tomorrow, I’ll tackle it tomorrow”.

KEEP IT IN PERSPECTIVE

Paradoxically, parents of autism spectrum kids are one of the most proactive groups that exist. While they commonly feel they’re not doing enough, these parents should be honored and commended. They’re able to cope with more in a day, a month and a year than most can conceive of coping with in a lifetime. Their resilience, creativity and persistence help their children progress and reach potential that nobody thought possible. The great strides that have been made in the autism community are largely due to parent driven establishment. The next time the guilt factor sets in, keep it in perspective and remember the following points.

1. You’re not alone
You are a great parent. You are your child’s best advocate. You have a lot on your plate. Your days are often filled with a great deal of mental anguish and emotional stress. You help your child through small activities that most parents don’t even think about. You fight for services for your child. You fight for the best class placement. It can be tiring. It can be exhausting. As you look around, you often feel that other parents are doing a better job. Realize they think the same of you. The guilt factor impedes their life too. Parents of autism spectrum kids have a common bond. They understand, they empathize and they spur each other on. If you declare “My 6 year old dressed independently today” they rejoice with you, because they too appreciate every milestone, large or small.

2. Organizations
Parents of children with autism have been the catalyst of some of the largest and most successful establishments for helping those on the spectrum. This is on a worldwide basis. A large number of autism schools have been driven by parents. Special education distributors and manufacturers often have parents at the helm. Researchers and educators are often parents. Increased services in schools and communities are the result of parent driven efforts. Non profit establishments have teams of dedicated parents who are committed to helping those on the spectrum. You might not be part of one of these establishments but you have made a difference. It’s the combined unity of parents and a strong voice when advocating for your child that calls these organizations into being.

3. Relationships
When your child is born you are instantly a parent. The role of a parent is to love, educate and support your child. You provide your child with values, teach right from wrong, build their self esteem and guide them to become happy, independent adults. When you have a child with autism, you become a teacher. The role of a teacher is to educate a child. Whether it’s a small task or a large task, teachers use every opportunity to educate a child. As a parent of a child on the spectrum it’s difficult to maintain a balance. While you want your child to learn as much as possible, you also simply want to be a parent. The next time the guilt factor sets in because you’re not teaching your child at every moment, release it immediately. Your child loves it when you’re just being a Mom or just being a Dad. While it’s perfectly fine to teach some of the time, a healthy balance leads to a healthy relationship between you and your child. Enjoy those moments with your child. Even if they aren’t typical interactions, they’re certainly fun!

4. Acceptance
On asking adults with autism “What’s the single piece of advice you would give to parents of autism spectrum kids?” the answer is almost always a unanimous “Unconditional love and acceptance.” For just a moment, view your child’s perspective. Almost every action gets corrected. Almost every behavior is modified. Method of play is considered inappropriate. Self stimulatory behavior is often halted. Your child is constantly being told to think, talk and act in a way that is foreign to his inner nature. It can’t be easy to keep one’s self esteem intact. I certainly advocate teaching as many skills as possible to help your child function in life. However, it’s essential your child knows you believe he is perfect just the way he is. It’s simply unfortunate that others might have difficulty understanding him. Your child should intrinsically know the reason he’s learning new skills and altering his behavior is not because you want to change him, but because it will help others relate to him, grant him acceptance and allow him to lead a more productive life. The next time you feel guilty about not correcting your child’s behavior or mannerisms, remember that delighting in your child’s unique qualities is just as important as teaching appropriate actions.

The next time the Guilt Factor impedes your life, simply acknowledge its presence. You don’t feel guilty because you’re a bad parent. You feel guilty because you’re an outstanding parent. You’re a parent who loves your child dearly. You’re a parent who is so committed to helping your child learn that you feel bad taking time for yourself. Your hard work, dedication, energy and eternal giving are unbeknown to most and recognized by few. I acknowledge you and say “Well done! I know how committed you are and what it takes. You are an exceptional parent and I recognize your greatness!

- By Jene Aviram
This article is property of and copyright © 2003-2007 Jene Aviram of Natural Learning Concepts. Reference of this article may only be included in your documentation provided that reference is made to the owner - Jene Aviram and a reference to this site http://www.nlconcepts.com

Happy Birthday Grandma Sharon!

The kids would like to wish a very happy birthday to their Grandma Sharon! They miss her and wish they could be with her on her special day!
Hope to see you soon Grandma!

Better Late Than Never...

Well, the flooding subsided few weeks ago, but I thought I would get some pics posted anyway for those of you who might still be interested. I know most of Iowa is still cleaning up from it... we are far from being back to normal. And Des Moines definitely didn't get the worst of it- I've seen pics from Cedar Rapids that are beyond belief.



This is the road that the geek usually takes to work- this is only a few miles from our house.





These are the baseball fields that are just off I-80 a few miles from our house. This is the worst area that we saw. As you can see, the water is above the fence in most areas and the dugouts and buildings were under water.


And you think you're bored by these pics? Just look how excited DD was when we went out to take them!

Happy Birthday Cousin!

DD and DS would like to wish a very happy 3rd birthday to their favorite cousin! We can't wait for her party next weekend!

Tutu Fun!

For some insane reason, I decided this weekend all the little girls in my life needed to have tutus. Like I don't have enough going on that I need to take time to make tutus. BUT, I did. I found directions on the internet for a no-sew tutu, went to Hobby Lobby and bought tulle and got started. Hours later I was wondering why I thought this was a good idea. But they are cute... even DS got in on the fun!

Still Alive...

We're still alive here... sorry it has been so long since I did a lengthy post with pics. I've been having computer problems- you would think with my very own geek here in the house I would have a reliable machine! From one day to the next it's working... then it's not. And all my pics are saved on another drive... yadda, yadda!
I promise... I'll get back to regular posting soon!

Happy 4th of July!

The kids are asleep, the geek is out with friends and I just watched fireworks, alone, on my deck. Oh, the exciting life I lead!